My "AH HA" Moment

So I'm almost 30 and just had an epiphany the other day. Well, I like to call it my "light bulb" or "ah ha" moment. After several bad relationships I've always wondered if it's something that I'm doing wrong. I mean it's like it's a pattern with men. In the past I've seemed to attract men who don't have any goals or anything going for themselves; the ones that I end up taking care of. Usually, it's been the "bad boy" type and the ones who abuse me mentally, emotionally, verbally, and physically. Well, I will say my last 2 serious relationships were like that. I went thru a lot and learned a lot. Even went thru the guys cheating on me. And I always wondered, "Why is it when I'm so nice, so sweet, trustworthy, honest, and couldn't hurt a fly, I still get treated like dirt?" Well, ladies let me tell you I came to the realization that we get what we ask for. If we don't raise our standards and DEMAND to be treated with respect, then men WILL walk all over us! I am now talking to a guy who is COMPLETELY opposite from the guys I've dated in the past. He's kind, generous, honest, trustworthy, considerate, genuine, has a job, a license, a car, a place of his own, and comes from a very stable home life. I think a lot of times women don't realize how important it is for a man to come from a stable background. Usually if he sees his father treat his mother with respect he grows up knowing how to treat a woman. That's a HUGE sign to look for and something I really didn't care about before. Love makes us lower our standards and we shouldn't stoop to that. My past relationships started out with me saying what I won't put up with and I still stayed with the person even though he was doing what I didn't agree with. For too long now women have been putting up with men's crap and not standing up for what they truly deserve! When I started this blog I knew I wanted to help others to overcome the demons in their lives and to realize that everyone deserves respect, and if you're not getting it it's time to move on. So many women deal with trust issues after going thru bad relationships, and yes, that does include me. I told myself not too long ago that I didn't know how I was going to be able to trust someone again when I THOUGHT I knew the person I was with. So basically, my "light bulb" moment was...Since I finally know what I don't want and what I want in a man, I know exactly what traits to look for in a person. I won't compromise my standards or morals for someone and I won't bring my past into my present and future. So many of us think that once our heart is broken it can never be put back together and that's not true. If we don't take a chance on love and take a leap then how will we ever find TRUE love! I would much rather keep trying and possibly get hurt than not try at all. Give love a chance and don't settle for less! If you see red flags about a person then listen to your intuition. Most of the time it's much wiser to listen to your head and your gut than your heart. You never know, prince charming could be right around the corner! Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is. The way we cope with it is what makes the difference! Still Standing Strong, Jen